Post by unanimous on Oct 27, 2011 13:09:18 GMT 3
It is an interview of two women living in Syria. One woman is a muslim with her head covered, and the other woman, I am not sure what her beliefs are, but she was interviewed in her negligee early in the morning....so im assuming....catholic?...but was in an arranged marriage? so i dont know. However, it is not about differences in religion, but religion is such an all encompassing belief that if you believe in one devoutly enough, it manifests in most of the things you try to do, try to become. The movie, when it was introduced was supposed to break taboos, or discuss taboos. For a non-muslim, it is a good review of what are still considered taboos, but it is quite hard to follow because i think some thoughts might have been lost in translation of the english subtitles, and some "taboos" are often a non-issue already for others.
The muslim woman is happy in her married life, she has a supportive husband, 3 or 4 daughters i think. She stopped working for awhile when she had her kids, but then went back to have a career again when she hired a maid and found herself with more free time. Im sure there is more nuance to her story but that is her gist. She is not the "traditional" muslim who have kids and cant go out to work. Is that one of the taboos? After living here for 5 years and seeing muslim women who are working, i forgot that there are some who are still forbidden to work. so apparently, she is a progressive type because she wants more freedom for her daughter, she puts them in nonsegregated schools, she wants her daughters to have more freedom for......what? One daughter wanted to study music but she didnt and does not know what happened to that dream...so maybe that snippet of information is not related. editing problem (?) This is where I am stumped. When she was growing up, she related her father gave her a bicycle to ride, but she can only ride it in their farm, because this practice is...for lack of a better term, bad. But from the way she related it, it is a significant gift, maybe a yearning that's been answered. But after the film, I dont know what she wants for her daughters, what she wants to give to her daughters that is equivalent to that bike that she received from her father. if she wants to give them something more than a bike, or if they already have one.
The smoking woman in negligee apparently got married against her wishes. The night before her marriage, she got slapped...i am not sure if by her fiance or by her father or both one after the other. She has daughters, she got divorced - again, i dont know which came first. And definitely she does not want to be slapped again by her father because apparently the first time he did, caused her five years of miserable married life. She said said sex with her ex-husband is a church-and-society-approved rape. She is now a single mother who owns a successful business, but apparently still not happy and is afraid to admit it lest she sound ungrateful for all the things 'she consider as blessings'. She listens to her children the way she would have wanted her mother to listen to her; she wants her kids to 'learn more' before getting married. She wants to have her children's life, to be young again, to start over i think is her yearning. She is not happy. it's like she is just constantly rebelling, first from her father, then from her husband, and now against time by trying to live a life she couldnt when she was younger, while under the influence of her family and then her husband.
At first glance, i had the impression that it will be about women in the middle east. A very interesting enough subject that there is so much to run away with for a film maker. A good film makes you feel, but a better film makes you think, teaches you new things, encourages you to venture out of your comfort zone and think. with 'women issues' there are indeed a lot of taboos to be broken. But the conversation and scenes seem to lack focus, what was the message and purpose for the film? with just the film speaking for itself, what was the definite stand of the film maker? by showing the progressive muslim woman in a happy state and the other woman who broke taboos in her life who ended up with kids and successful career to be a sad woman? ashamed and sad? the muslim woman looks satisfied, and the other woman admits she is not happy but is ashamed or afraid to say so, and wanders off in her garden in her negligee or negligee type dress.
the basic issue (or yearning?) women everywhere encounter, regardless of religion, economic status, academic achievement or mode of dress, niqab or no niqab, is lack of respect as a fellow human being, and our society, lifestyle, geographic locations dictates how this lack of respect be manifested in varying sad and often irrational forms.
In our world, women have to live up to expectations of society, family and friends. It does not matter that you have the same academic achievement, for some career positions, women still get paid less than if a man assumes that same job. It does not matter that you are economically stable, not a menace to the society, not self-destructive, some people will still find you lacking if you dont have a husband or children. because that's what children also learn from adults and so the cycle goes on.
Women, from the time they are born are consciously or unconsciously encouraged to be beautiful, to act in a certain manner usually superficial that has no immediate relation to how you respect another human being. If you are with a man, you are not to carry your own groceries because it does not look good, it makes the man look weak, or let some other worker carry it for you because carrying your own things is beneath the expectation of the society or your family. It does not matter that it does not make sense, or you cheat that guy from doing other more important thing, as long as the image of you not carrying anything is established. does that lack consideration and respect for the image of the other human being carrying your things? we are thought not to care, as long as the difference is established.
As a child, it does not matter if you are mean inside or hit other kids, the first thing most strangers will say to you is how pretty you are and that reinforces the belief that you have to be one for a child in her limited means only gets attention that way or when one cries. Later on, you are only to act in a certain way otherwise your 'reputation' will be ruined and no man will marry you. When do a lot of girls first realize they are 'adults'.... when a teenage girl walks out in her shorts, and men start making catcalls and pervy comments, thats when you realize you are no longer a child, or when another woman shames you for the length of your skirt, short, etc that are superficial and has no bearing to how you kind or a bitch you may be. the superficial appearance, difference has to be established, and manipulated. when you are born with boobs and all of a sudden you are made to feel ashamed for it when it is a naturally biological thing, men start leering at it, and other women shames you for having it. men rob you of your childhood and stamps their approval for your joining the adult world. fresh meat. or stale. men dictates how much you can earn in your workplace. and most men of certain upbringing insist on dictating how you act, when to have sex and how many children you should bear regardless of biology. All your life, wherever you look, tv, magazine ads, friends, family, society, you are groomed for that final destination of marriage and children, an ultimate approval from a man. the ultimate carrot to their shaming sticks. both men and women play into this game. why cant a person just be a person? find out for themselves what they really want without everyone else dictating what they should be or should have? let each human being be treated as a human. thats an easy enough rule, yet seem so complicated and hard to put into practice.
in some parts of the world women outnumber the men who have jobs, who are enrolled in higher education, who are more economically viable. but the yearning is still there of something elusive. Because in spite of these huge leaps and achievements women has achieved, society's ultimate expection from a woman is marriage and children. to be submissive, either from husband's will or society which a man dominates. when you say be whoever you want to be, there should be no time limit except death. No amount of money or number of diploma can make a difference if you dont treat women as a fellow human being just like you would treat yourself. money and diplomas are just decoys to give women an appearance of equality, but the lack of respect lives on. that something elusive is independence of thought and action, and respect as a human being.
The muslim woman is happy in her married life, she has a supportive husband, 3 or 4 daughters i think. She stopped working for awhile when she had her kids, but then went back to have a career again when she hired a maid and found herself with more free time. Im sure there is more nuance to her story but that is her gist. She is not the "traditional" muslim who have kids and cant go out to work. Is that one of the taboos? After living here for 5 years and seeing muslim women who are working, i forgot that there are some who are still forbidden to work. so apparently, she is a progressive type because she wants more freedom for her daughter, she puts them in nonsegregated schools, she wants her daughters to have more freedom for......what? One daughter wanted to study music but she didnt and does not know what happened to that dream...so maybe that snippet of information is not related. editing problem (?) This is where I am stumped. When she was growing up, she related her father gave her a bicycle to ride, but she can only ride it in their farm, because this practice is...for lack of a better term, bad. But from the way she related it, it is a significant gift, maybe a yearning that's been answered. But after the film, I dont know what she wants for her daughters, what she wants to give to her daughters that is equivalent to that bike that she received from her father. if she wants to give them something more than a bike, or if they already have one.
The smoking woman in negligee apparently got married against her wishes. The night before her marriage, she got slapped...i am not sure if by her fiance or by her father or both one after the other. She has daughters, she got divorced - again, i dont know which came first. And definitely she does not want to be slapped again by her father because apparently the first time he did, caused her five years of miserable married life. She said said sex with her ex-husband is a church-and-society-approved rape. She is now a single mother who owns a successful business, but apparently still not happy and is afraid to admit it lest she sound ungrateful for all the things 'she consider as blessings'. She listens to her children the way she would have wanted her mother to listen to her; she wants her kids to 'learn more' before getting married. She wants to have her children's life, to be young again, to start over i think is her yearning. She is not happy. it's like she is just constantly rebelling, first from her father, then from her husband, and now against time by trying to live a life she couldnt when she was younger, while under the influence of her family and then her husband.
At first glance, i had the impression that it will be about women in the middle east. A very interesting enough subject that there is so much to run away with for a film maker. A good film makes you feel, but a better film makes you think, teaches you new things, encourages you to venture out of your comfort zone and think. with 'women issues' there are indeed a lot of taboos to be broken. But the conversation and scenes seem to lack focus, what was the message and purpose for the film? with just the film speaking for itself, what was the definite stand of the film maker? by showing the progressive muslim woman in a happy state and the other woman who broke taboos in her life who ended up with kids and successful career to be a sad woman? ashamed and sad? the muslim woman looks satisfied, and the other woman admits she is not happy but is ashamed or afraid to say so, and wanders off in her garden in her negligee or negligee type dress.
the basic issue (or yearning?) women everywhere encounter, regardless of religion, economic status, academic achievement or mode of dress, niqab or no niqab, is lack of respect as a fellow human being, and our society, lifestyle, geographic locations dictates how this lack of respect be manifested in varying sad and often irrational forms.
In our world, women have to live up to expectations of society, family and friends. It does not matter that you have the same academic achievement, for some career positions, women still get paid less than if a man assumes that same job. It does not matter that you are economically stable, not a menace to the society, not self-destructive, some people will still find you lacking if you dont have a husband or children. because that's what children also learn from adults and so the cycle goes on.
Women, from the time they are born are consciously or unconsciously encouraged to be beautiful, to act in a certain manner usually superficial that has no immediate relation to how you respect another human being. If you are with a man, you are not to carry your own groceries because it does not look good, it makes the man look weak, or let some other worker carry it for you because carrying your own things is beneath the expectation of the society or your family. It does not matter that it does not make sense, or you cheat that guy from doing other more important thing, as long as the image of you not carrying anything is established. does that lack consideration and respect for the image of the other human being carrying your things? we are thought not to care, as long as the difference is established.
As a child, it does not matter if you are mean inside or hit other kids, the first thing most strangers will say to you is how pretty you are and that reinforces the belief that you have to be one for a child in her limited means only gets attention that way or when one cries. Later on, you are only to act in a certain way otherwise your 'reputation' will be ruined and no man will marry you. When do a lot of girls first realize they are 'adults'.... when a teenage girl walks out in her shorts, and men start making catcalls and pervy comments, thats when you realize you are no longer a child, or when another woman shames you for the length of your skirt, short, etc that are superficial and has no bearing to how you kind or a bitch you may be. the superficial appearance, difference has to be established, and manipulated. when you are born with boobs and all of a sudden you are made to feel ashamed for it when it is a naturally biological thing, men start leering at it, and other women shames you for having it. men rob you of your childhood and stamps their approval for your joining the adult world. fresh meat. or stale. men dictates how much you can earn in your workplace. and most men of certain upbringing insist on dictating how you act, when to have sex and how many children you should bear regardless of biology. All your life, wherever you look, tv, magazine ads, friends, family, society, you are groomed for that final destination of marriage and children, an ultimate approval from a man. the ultimate carrot to their shaming sticks. both men and women play into this game. why cant a person just be a person? find out for themselves what they really want without everyone else dictating what they should be or should have? let each human being be treated as a human. thats an easy enough rule, yet seem so complicated and hard to put into practice.
in some parts of the world women outnumber the men who have jobs, who are enrolled in higher education, who are more economically viable. but the yearning is still there of something elusive. Because in spite of these huge leaps and achievements women has achieved, society's ultimate expection from a woman is marriage and children. to be submissive, either from husband's will or society which a man dominates. when you say be whoever you want to be, there should be no time limit except death. No amount of money or number of diploma can make a difference if you dont treat women as a fellow human being just like you would treat yourself. money and diplomas are just decoys to give women an appearance of equality, but the lack of respect lives on. that something elusive is independence of thought and action, and respect as a human being.